Monster too

 It's been hectic and tiredness weeks for me. yess. It's so hard yet I need to go through all of this just to pass these days. I missed the old me. the brave one. the very high self-confident, very kind to everyone, and not a shy person. 


nowdays, I've change a lot. I mean it. a very alott ~ Im a shy person. not confident, easily lost hope, almost everytime gave up easily, and lazy to think that I need to be strong. Im not sure why. probably Im already tired with this world. whenever I want to gave up, I hold my anger, then the an anxiety comes consume my soul. I am an anxiety fighter too but Im just sad. my soul is sad. very2 upset. 


for now, I just need to travel for theraphy. but I can't do theraphy long enough since I got a lot of shits to be done here. its oke. I used to be monster, strict, discipline, very high confident, and a very good adviser to everyone. and also, monster have feelings too ;')


Moon and Sun

 I wish I could understand what you're thinking of me. So, I can explain to you and we can stay together. BUT, you rather to choose avoid and think of me that I am like that kind of person.


I'm bz with study, family, and more plans that going through in my day. Not everything I can explain and say it in words. Its sad knowing a friend like you. hving a bad attitude and act shit with me.  I just want having a friends who thinks like :


"I understand why she act like that.."

"ooh, she is bz now. its oke, later she will contact us bck..:

"even she bz, lets just pray for her and wait for her.."


no matter how bz and where I am, I always remember and keep in mind whos there with me and a great friend of mine. too bad FACT, almost most of it like that. no one understand what Im thinking and who I am exactly. Its ok, losing a friend like you. doesn't make me dead, But Im not sure in the future someday I might missing you.


you be happy with that way, then Me too. because like a Moon who doesn't understand why Sun is hot and Sun can't understand why the moon shape is not the same like always.