I was questioning my place.
Not you...
but whether I was still
safe in your heart.
Somewhere between my words
and your understanding,
everything got lost.
And now I’m here
trying to explain something
that was never meant
to hurt you.
and again dear letter, and hii my love.
When you said I was questioning your loyalty, that honestly caught me off guard because that was never what I meant. It never even crossed my mind to doubt you like that. I wasn’t accusing you of anything—I was just trying to express how I feel and be honest about my insecurities.
I think somewhere along the way, what I was trying to say got misunderstood, and I’m not sure how to explain it better without it sounding wrong to you.
But I need you to understand this clearly, I wasn’t attacking you or your loyalty. I was just opening up, and I hoped you would try to understand me instead of assuming the worst.
I wasn’t accusing you,
I was unraveling myself
in front of you.
Every word I said
came from a place
that needed comfort,
not defense.
But you stood there
like I was pointing fingers,
when all I ever did
was open my hands.
And somehow,
my honesty became
something you had to fight...
ehem. dot dot..
Somewhere between
what I felt
and what you heard,
we broke.
I said, “I’m hurting,”
you heard, “You did something wrong.”
I said, “I need reassurance,”
you heard, “I don’t trust you.”
And no matter how I tried
to explain it again,
your mind was already made. (its getting painful enough, thats why i make calls on you. but you ignore me that easily)
I’m tired
of explaining feelings
that were never meant
to hurt you.
Tired of reshaping my words
so you won’t misunderstand them,
only to still end up
being wrong in your eyes.
At some point,
it stops being miscommunication
and starts feeling like
you just don’t want to understand.
